You steer all conversations back to your soon to be puppy.
Say you’re hosting a BBQ with friends and strike up convo: “Are you hungry? We can grill up some hot dogs… yea uh… speaking of dogs, did I tell you we’re getting a puppy?” “Uh, only 37 times.”
You smile aggressively at other dog owners.
You are walking through downtown and see someone walking their dog. Instead of offering a half smile, you stare way too long in their direction. You may even throw in a few verbal gestures like “awww!” or “so cute!” In some cases, you may even squat down to pet the little fur ball at eye level. So now not only have you creeped out the dog owner but you probably also made him late. Just add in a little heavy breathing and consider yourself restraining ordered.
You show everyone and anyone pictures of your soon to be dog.
OMG! Look at her cute little paw here. Do you see it? Yeah, so what if I took this photo through the window of our breeder’s home? Who cares? It’s still cute. Oh, and look and what she’s doing here. She’s SLEEPING! Oh my god who sleeps like that? Only my dog because she is the cutest thing ever…
You watch puppy videos whenever you get the chance.
Lets be honest. My most recent google searches are: cute puppies, fluffy cute puppies, puppy run, puppy cute, puppy lay, puppy with baby. I’m not proud. But if you’re reading this, you probably aren’t either.
You dream about “pulling a Megan from Bridemaids” and just taking all the puppies when you finally pick up your pup.
If you don’t describe this scene as “dream” then you are a liar. We are renting a 15-person passenger van for puppy pick up day just in case.
You research anything and everything to prepare for the big day.
Seriously, if there’s an exam I think I’d ace it. A few months ago though? Probably not. We’ve researched everything from puppy treats to puppy hotels (by the way there are actual hotels solely for dogs). Oh and now that I think about it. I guess there is a test at the end of this. It’s called ACTUALLY RAISING A DOG.
You go to Petsmart once a week… ok fine everyday.
It’s always super awkward when you walk in and the workers ask what kind of dog you have. When you immediately say “oh I don’t have one” they just classify you as a creep and are long gone before you can explain that you ARE getting one. I think our faces are on a poster in their break room.
You check out the neighborhood dog scene.
Do you find yourself going for walks much more often now? Because in a few weeks you’ll know walks will become a part of your daily routine? Might as well get to know the neighborhood ahead of time. But take it from us, don’t hit up the dog park without a dog… its never a good look… I mean, so we hear…
You spend your entire paycheck on dog toys.
Okay she is DEFINITELY going to need another one of these. You know what? Might as well get two to be safe. And she doesn’t have enough chew toys. There needs to be the perfect balance of plush, rubber, chew, balls, etc. You know variety is the spice of life and Reagan will hold her new parents to these standards! Anyone else? Anyone…
You create a dog blog.
When people see you in the grocery store and duck behind a display of corn you are probably doing more than one of these things. We don’t care. We will talk your ear off about baby Rae without any apologies. And when we’ve exhausted all Youtube videos, sabotaged all friendships with doggy details, been put on a list at Petsmart, and need to get a part time job to support our new fur ball, you may find yourself here: blogging about your girl to a whole new pool of victims.
Do these ring a bell for you? What crazy things did you do when preparing for your puppy?